If Trump Thought Kimmel’s WHCD Roast Was Rough, He’s Gonna Hate Triumph the Insult Comic Dog’s
Who better to poop on the White House Correspondents Dinner than Triumph the Insult Comic Dog?
On Saturday, when it was still supposed to be a fun night at the Washington Hilton (and before a maniac tried to assassinate the President) Robert Smigel‘s vulgar pooch puppet sat like a good boy in the red carpet line. When it was his turn, Triumph lifted his leg and took aim at the evening’s red-hat-wearing Republican guests.
Serving as a credentialed Daily Show correspondent for the evening, the Rottweiler (or Montenegrin Mountain Hound, it’s a bit unclear) called the White House Correspondents Association Dinner “the annual gathering of the press that celebrates — or in tonight’s case, fondly remembers — free speech.”
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“On this night, members of the press sit down for a lavish dinner served by some of their former colleagues,” Triumph/Smigel continued, dubbing the evening “a black-tie January 6.”
“So many of the biggest names in D.C. are here, such as Redacted. And Redacted,” Triumph gushed.
You see, it’s all funny because it’s true — unfortunately, including the state-of-the-media-business quips.
Triumph’s harshest punchline — also his best one — was reserved for actress Cheryl Hines (Curb Your Enthusiasm), the wife of United States Secretary of Health and Human Services Robert F. Kennedy Jr.
“Cheryl, what’s special about this night? Other than it’s the only celebrity party you’re invited to anymore?”
Hines did not look amused. I bet Larry David would have laughed.
Triumph next cracked a few jokes that were ostensibly about mentalist Oz Pearlman’s act, only they were not about it at all.
“If the mentalist asks Trump to pick a number, it will probably be under 18, would you agree?” he asked Fox News Channel’s Peter Doocy.
He kids, he kids.
Pearlman was the booked featured entertainment for the evening, a slot usually reserved for a comedian to roast the guest of honor (the POTUS) and others on the dais and seated around the ballroom. Early into Pearlman’s act, the dinner was abruptly halted when a man with guns briefly breached the security line. Shots were fired and secret service agents subdued the man, who now faces life in prison.
To the other “Oz” attending the program, Dr. Mehmet Oz, Triumph asked: “Would you worry if he pulls a rabbit out of his hat, will RFK try to eat it?” (Come on Triumph, the “cut its penis off?” punchline was right there!)
Other highlights: “Honoring the First Amendment with Donald Trump is kind of like having Kanye come for Passover.”
And: “Do you think Trump’s going to tell some jokes, like how he won the Iran war? And how gas prices are going down?”
Finally, to Marco Rubio: “Just tell me which country you’re attacking next — I’m trying to win some money on Polymarket.”
You’ve already won, Triumph. Watch the performance here:
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