Barack Obama reveals that Trump has caused ‘genuine tension’ in his marriage to Michelle: ‘It frustrates her’

Barack Obama says that the demands of being a Democratic Party figurehead continue to weigh on his marriage — a full 10 years after he and former first lady Michelle Obama left the White House for good.

The nation’s first Black president remains a cultural force in American politics, both on the left, where he is one of the party’s most valued centrist voices, and on the right, where he remains a top target of anger and scorn — particularly in the eyes of Donald Trump, his successor and the current holder of his office.

In a new interview with The New Yorker’s Peter Slevin, the 44th president reflected on how his hopes that Trump would be restricted by the guardrails of the presidency and the Constitution were quickly dissolved by reality, and how that reality almost immediately supercharged calls for Obama to speak out about Trump’s first presidency, especially as he unveiled the first attempt to ban Muslims from traveling to the United States and later widely expanded U.S. immigration detention programs.

That pressure, in turn, affects his marriage, Obama said. “It does create a genuine tension in our household, and it frustrates her,” Barack said of Michelle Obama’s thoughts on the constant calls for him to react. He noted that those efforts included returning to the campaign trail for consecutive cycles, whether that meant cutting ads or appearing directly with candidates.

“She wants to see her husband easing up and spending more time with her, enjoying what remains of our lives,” President Obama said.

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The former president has long been open to frank talk about how political life has affected his family, and especially how the scrutiny of being the first Black family living in the White House put unique pressures on both Michelle and their daughters, Sasha and Malia.

But it could still be disappointing for the legions of Democratic voters who continue to hold out hope that Michelle herself would enter politics, possibly precipitating a return of the first family to the presidential residence.

Other Democrats who spoke to The New Yorker for the same article called those hopes well-intentioned but misguided, and representative of hopes for a now-bygone era.

“I would say that we are all a little naïve if we think that can happen again. There’s nostalgia for him, yet — how can I put this? — in the political world that I’m in, there is an understanding that we are in a different time,” said Sen. Tina Smith, a soon retiring Democrat from Minnesota.

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Most recently, the former president worked to support efforts to trigger mid-decade redistricting in Virginia, where Democrats are hoping to redraw four congressional seats into their hands ahead of the midterm elections — part of a larger gerrymandering war begun by Republicans in Texas. His side’s efforts succeeded, and the ballot measure passed by a narrow margin. The former president also supported California’s efforts to do the same last year.

In his own interview, the former president added that his refusal to get even further involved with politics stemmed from his desire to not become a “commentator”.

“For me to function like Jon Stewart, even once a week, just going off, just ripping what was happening—which, by the way, I’m glad Jon’s doing it—then I’m not a political leader, I’m a commentator,” said Obama. He claimed that many Democrats do not see all of his involvement, further adding to frustrations.

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For some progressives, the dynamics are a bit different. Some of the same voices publicly grumbling about the former president relative tendency to take on a background role in the party were publicly fuming after the 2020 primary when it was revealed that Obama had spoken to candidates including Pete Buttigieg after his former vice president, Joe Biden, won the South Carolina primary — beginning an avalanche that propelled Biden to victory over Bernie Sanders.

Then, four years later, it was Biden loyalists including members of the Biden camp itself outraged after Obama was reported to be among the Democrats who wanted him to step aside and let Kamala Harris take over the presidential ticket following a disastrous debate performance against Donald Trump.

Not helping matters, some of the firmest calls for Biden to drop out came from the hosts of Pod Save America, all of whom served prominent roles in the Obama campaigns and White House.

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